The Importance of Self Care And a Life

Generally I try to stay less focused on politics here on this blog. I do that for many reasons. One being I want it to be a place where all people feel relatively comfortable. Unfortunately, I gotta go there for a minute. It happens every once in a while. Let me start out by saying I am a private person and like all private people I have a right to my views and opinions and you have a right to yours.

I originate in an international Buddhist hippy commune. I have traveled the world, have seen so very much high functioning from other societies. I am deeply disturbed by what I am watching play out in Washington. I am the salt of the earth. A farm girl, on a small farm living more off the grid than on. I feel let down and abandoned. I feel like no one is fighting for me. I feel like no one is standing up to oligarchy and fascism. Where the hell are the people who have been screaming democracy is on the ballot???

I am not alone in my feelings. We are all of us watching the chaos ensue. One day we are invading Greenland, the next day we are ethnically cleansing Gaza, and the next it is a trade war that will raise the prices of pumpkin seeds, which as a farmer quite honestly bothers me. It should bother every farmer. It is easy to get carried away by the chaos train. Run over by the oligarchy bus, and crashed into by the fascism helicopter.

AOC, a woman I admire, but then, remember who I am, where I come from and where I live. I am as blue as dirt. That being said, where ever you fall you should respect someone like AOC, agree or disagree your choice. But respect, this woman has earned. So she should have it from all. AOC, spoke the other day in a video I happened to accident upon about what is being done and what we can do. One thing she discussed, is not allowing ourselves to spin out on a diet of the crazy coming out of Washington. She recommended making room for self soothing activities, for self care. I thought, I would tell you about some of what I do for those purposes, so I don’t lose it completely.

It was also recently requested that I share some photos of my goats and animals. I thought with this post it couples very well as what is more soothing than photos of cute furry creatures?

I have turned off the tv. I find that the stuff I am watching on the media is very stressful due to the inflection and tone of voices as well as the words choice and what is being covered. In addition the facial expressions can become a lot. Watching these people react causes me to become reactive. We don’t need to react. We need our representatives to act. They are very different things, reaction and action. TV, makes use of multiple human senses, so it can I think feel even more like overload. So I have  for the vast most part turned it off. Instead, every night, we light the oil lamps, and the candles after we make dinner. We sit in the dark, to eat, and in a quiet calm peaceful, candle lit environment, we listen to the news much as they did back during the era preceding and during the second world war. No talking heads or opinion. Just facts, and factual information on the impact of those facts.

Also, I find that tv in general even beyond the news causes heightened levels of stress given actors are trying to get and keep your attention while performing a drama meant to suck you in and take you on an adventure…. Humans, were not meant to always be in a heightened state. We blame Covid, for a lot of mental illness. Perhaps another factor is the level of stress too much tv and too much stressful media create for us when taken constantly, and together due to their use of multiple human senses? It is ok to turn it off. It is even healthy.

I am reading a lot more books, which I love. I am engaging with a lot more hobbies that calm me.  For example getting Satu, fixed and working again. She exudes a calming influence. Knitting more too has been calming. Time in the greenhouse is calming, books interact with the brain differently than the tv overwhelm of multiple senses at once. I am baking more too. I have started listening to more audio books, as well as to old timey radio. I was listening just the other day to one of the old Fireside Adresses, about the situation during the great depression. It was amazing to see the way it was calmly discussed, the re-assurance offered…. Really worth while to listen to the past and to contrast it to the present. It’s eye opening. We have been listening to Ripley’s Believe It Or Not from the 1930s, The Hitch Hiker’s Guide To The Galaxy from 1978, War Of The Worlds, a radio show that once caused a nation to freak out thinking the martians had landed and were invading. We listen to podcasts, often unsolved true crime. We like puzzles. What is nice, is I can do this listening in a dim calm place while Satu, spins round as I press on her treadle and create more yarn to knit.

In the spring, the gardening will move outside. There will be lots of chill time by the pool so no one dies working from heat stroke. True story, it almost happened once when I was alone here for 2 weeks on the farm. No one would have found my body for 9 days. So something was done, the pool, for outdoor heat safety. Sometimes, I sit around under the wisteria, with a snack and a book, some soft music, and just read or practice taking deep breaths in the spring. The truth is homesteading can cause extreme burn out. Finding ways not to burn out is imperative to a healthy homestead life. So these acts of taking a moment or some me time regularly are necessary. I like to look at the scenery, the green and the woods, goats playing on the hill, and take a moment to just sit with my good luck and appreciate it. To be here doing this, it means everything.

I plant, and pull weeds, I go horseback riding when I need to be physically active as a means of relaxation, especially when it is a bad day for swimming. Sometimes I walk in my woods breathing in the microbes from the soil and the trees that hang in the air. The former, are a natural anti depressant. A good forest bath always makes me feel better. Time in nature, where humans are supposed to be, is hugely beneficial for our ability to relax.

Food too can be a source of relaxation. Cut out the the toxic junk, eat natural food, fill your body with good and healthy things, and it does impact the brain. I have experienced it as almost a rather sudden end of the sound of static in my thought process. It really does help you chill out. Cutting sugar, and other yuchiness.

I spend time with my animals. You don’t need a farm for that. Some of the most soothing times are spent with our dog, Pikku. Just rubbing her belly while she acts like a clown. Or hugging her at night while I fall asleep. Or accepting her massive bulk as she thumps her butt down on top of me. Sitting on me. Nothing makes me happier than seeing that tail wagging.

Some people I know spend a lot of time regularly meditating. As I said I originate with Buddhist hippies. Meditation, is a great way to soothe and find calm and the moment. Some hate it because they feel as though they fail since they can’t turn their mind off. Turning the mind off isn’t the point. Watching it work is. Understanding how it processes. Being present for that in the moment you find yourself in. That is all.

Some go to church or other religious functions, they find fulfillment in prayer. Nothing wrong with that unless your faith is telling you to hate people who are different than you. Then church becomes a problem. Otherwise, it is perfectly healthy and a wonderful way to settle down and keep a sense of hope alive.

Dr. Farmer Moomin, plays hockey once a week with his buddies from work when the waste water levels show low Covid, in our area. He seems to get a lot out of that for the health of his mind and body. There are many sports one can participate in. Yoga too is a great physical way to unwind.

One thing I like to do to unplug, and to regain my calm and focus, is write. Doesn’t really matter what. Sometimes I work on stories I have been picking at for years on Inkitt, other times, it is this blog. Sometimes, it is personal correspondences with pen pals I have in various parts of the world. I tend to like to keep in touch with people who are even more remote than I am. There is something peaceful about remoteness. So I like my pen pals to be from far away a different culture and a remote area living lives that are a bit different. But maybe you enjoy more cosmopolitan folks in large cities all over the world? Recently the FCC launched an investigation into advertising related to PBS and I do believe NPR. I fear the tractor of fascism, may soon come to mow down sources of legitimate news. Making it impossible for us to even follow what is happening around us. Staying in touch with people in places not run by a fascist regime, through the mail may mean news comes late. But it means continued access to legitimate information, maybe for good, maybe till they up end the mail also. But knowing you have legit info longer covered,  can cause a massive sigh of relief.

I study through the winter months. Homesteading is a lifetime study. I have always had a thing for music, archaeology, folklore, and literature. For very small sums of money, I can have access to education via the internet. Which is another thing I often do especially in the winter months when the farm chores slow down and the ice makes outside hazardous. Carter Haugh School, offers wonderful lessons and content on the study of folklore. I am involved with The School Of Traditional Skills, I am also connected to Wondrium. The last one, has helped me be aware of the animals walking about my homestead, taught me some great information about botany, literature, folklore, and so much more.

In the summer, I enjoy a good BBQ, with family or friends. Sitting outside in the middle of the cut flower garden. Flowers all around me. I bring them inside to help me find that quiet joy I experience outside. In winter, having guests at the farm for snow storms is a great way to kick back. I love a good blizzard. I bake, and we hang out with tea or sweet, hot spiced cider, watching the snow fall and enjoying the white out conditions that make us feel alone in the universe. As if we are outside time and space floating in a cozy bright spot in a sea of white. We laugh, play board games, which is actually an event we schedule here weekly for a couple of hours with friends. It’s been a while but every once in a while, we bring out the telescope on a clear night and tour the stars and constellations. Then we head back inside to warm up by the wood stove allowing the cozy heat to infect us.

I like to walk the farm sometimes photographing what I have done around the place and what is natural and beautiful. This too brings me peace. It is also crucial to the continuation of this blog.

Rarely, we take a few days and the dog, and head for Cape Of Cod, stay at my dad’s place by the ocean now full of great white sharks due to climate change. We head out in the boat, drive it around visiting the seals. But Cape Cod, too has it’s stresses. It is hard for me to eat there due to allergies to fish and shell fish that are quite severe. So we go less and less especially now that we have a place to swim here. It’s the sand flats that I miss most when I stay away too long. Nothing in the world quite like them. Nothing as relaxing as a hike from sand bar to sandbar, stopping to study the life the ocean leaves behind when she vacates the premises temporarily. Collecting shells…. Sea glass, driftwood….

Dr. Farmer Moomin, really likes driving his tractor around mowing the lawn. Maybe it is that a chore got done and that makes him feel relaxed? Or it is sitting on a slow moving tractor listening to music, but he always seems so much more chill after he he has mowed. During Covid, we started going for long drives around the area to look at the New England countryside. The tradition continues. Since I can’t drive he drives for these outings also. We often head west, through little knock about towns, and into the mountains, through wooded areas, and areas with farms, or towns with beautiful old houses.

Music! Just sitting around listening to it can be hugely beneficial for your sense of chillness. No joke, there was a whole mystery tradition in ancient Greece, that revolved around the power of music. They believed it could even raise the dead. Which is why we have the story of Orpheus, today. Music, isn’t just good for plants, it is good for us too. Music, is chronically going in Wildflower Farm farm house. https://tidal.com/browse/playlist/e147c31f-ceed-4fac-a7de-adbd2e471609 that is my general playlist. Please do enjoy it. I hope it brings you joy and peace. It isn’t really made for an exercise routine. It is made to create a sense of magical peace. 

Other activities I am involved with out here, include things like a book club and a craft circle that meet monthly. I host them. discussing books and crafting can truly soothe the soul especially when it also involves a little socializing.

If we don’t protect ourselves from burn out and mind spin, who will? The more we get rattled, the more the plan to destroy us, and our society works. It’s your mind. Reclaim it. It is your mental health. Take control of it. It is your peace, own it. From that place, we can act rather than react.

Thank you for reading
Sorry for the politics. I generally try to go light here but every now and again….
Well, I am human and I live not just at Wildflower, but in the world we all share.
That world can and does intrude. Keeping it in it’s place is so important right now.
Amanda Of Wildflower Farm